


Remember Everything

by aquastar89



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Cheating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:48:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24158368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquastar89/pseuds/aquastar89
Summary: He silently watched from his window as she cried. His heart should have been breaking. He should have had to fight the urge to run to her, hold her in his arms, tell her everything was alright, tell her he forgave her. He didn't though, he just watched her curiously. Amazed at how easily forgotten his feelings for her were. This was one of those times he loved being a vampire.AU with some elements from the show.
Relationships: Bonnie Bennett/Damon Salvatore
Comments: 3
Kudos: 21





	Remember Everything

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.
> 
> No beta. I try to edit the best I can, please forgive any mistakes.

_Damon was still trying to wrap his head around what had happened earlier that day. He and Bonnie had gotten into a fight, it wasn't their first by any means, but it was definitely the worst by far. Bonnie had caught him completely off guard with her outburst, he had actually stood speechless for a few minutes unable to comprehend what was happening. One minute they were discussing what to make for dinner and the next she was jumping down his throat about anything and everything she could think of._

_Admittedly, he had just chalked it up to it being that time of the month, though he would never tell her that, but eventually things took a more serious turn when she started bringing up Elena. His eyebrows were permanently fixed to his hairline while she went on and on about how he was still in love with her. The ridiculousness of that accusation had knocked him out of his shocked state and he was finally able to ask her what in the hell she was talking about. He vaguely remembered using the words crazy lady to describe her in her incensed state, which in hindsight probably wasn’t the best choice of words, but 20/20 and all that. She said she had seen the way he looked at Elena while they were visiting with her and his brother the day before, which just had him even more confused because when they had seen his happily married brother and wife of five years he had barely spared Elena a couple of glances and a few friendly words and he said as much. Bonnie however wasn't hearing it and said she knew what she saw and it was pointless for him to try and deny it._

_Damon would freely admit that he had once foolishly thought he was in love with his brothers then girlfriend, but after he pulled his head out of his ass and saw Bonnie for the beautiful, amazing and powerful woman that she was, he realized how stupid he had been. He knew now that the love he thought he held for Elena was pure jealousy, wanting what he couldn't have. He just couldn't understand what was so special about Stefan and why every girl seemed to want him. First Katherine, whom he spent the better part of his early years as a vampire trying to free from some stupid tomb because he loved her and he thought she had loved him as well, and then there was Katherine's doppelganger Elena, whom was really just the sweeter, kinder and all around better version of Katherine. He still loved Elena, just not any where near how he thought he once had. Now he loved her like the sister she was._

_It had taken falling in love with Bonnie to teach him what real love was. It was no easy feat either; he had fought his feelings for her tooth and nail and for as long as he could stand it. When he finally swallowed his pride and admitted how he felt about her, it was the best thing he had ever done. She was his saving grace, the love of his very long and very lonely life. He knew that everything he had done prier to falling in love with her had ultimately led him to her and for that reason he would do it all over again and without a second thought._

_That being said, he still had no idea what in the hell was wrong with his little witch. He asked her as much and she went off the deep end, saying the most ridiculous things about how he would never love her the way he loved Elena. The idea was so ridiculously absurd that he had to try really hard to not burst out laughing. Being acutely aware of Bonnie’s penchant for lighting things on fire however, and the fact that he really liked his brand new black leather jacket, he reigned in any and all thoughts of laughter._

_Damon had really tried to be the understanding boyfriend that his little witch knew and loved, but even he could only handle so much and had finally gotten angry when she wouldn't let up and started screaming and yelling at him for something he didn't do and most certainly didn't feel. He started yelling back about how she was acting like a five year old child and needed to grow the fuck up. He didn't know what she was talking about and he was tired of her accusations._

_When she screamed at him saying she knew that he would eventually cheat on her with Elena, he had lost it. One, he felt he needed to defend Elena a little bit since she couldn't defend herself and told Bonnie that Elena was very happily married to Stefan and would never do that to him and two that he was madly in love with her and wouldn't dream of ever being with another woman. Which was the truth, he loved Bonnie unconditionally and he never even thought about being with anyone else. She had ruined him for other women, if he couldn't have Bonnie he would probably just stake himself because he knew he would never be able to live eternity without her._

_All she had heard though was him standing up for Elena-of course. She screamed at him some more, he watched as the lights in the house flickered and the fire roared beside him and then she was out the door, slamming it behind her. He thought if she had been a vampire she would have taken it off the hinges. He had shook his head growling to himself and decided he needed a drink, which is how he ended up at the Mystic Grille downing his third glass of bourbon that wasn't nearly strong enough, wondering what in the world had caused the fight he couldn't believe they had over something he most certainly did not do. He knew he was an asshole-being with Bonnie had only altered that slightly-and he knew he did a lot of things that could warrant severe punishment, but being in love with Elena wasn't one of them because he wasn't in-fucking-love with Elena Gotdamnit._

_He sighed heavily, he knew as much as he really wasn't looking forward to it he had to go home and pray to God or whoever that she was willing to sit down and talk about what was really going on with her without her trying to set him on fire and without him trying to strangle her. Not that he would though, he would never dream of hurting Bonnie, but she was sure as hell pushing his limits to the breaking point earlier. Sighing again he laid the money down for his drinks and walked solemnly out of the Grille heading to their house. He didn't drive to the Grille because he needed to get that drink fast and his vampire speed got him everywhere faster, but now he was wishing he had drove because he wasn't in that big of a hurry to face his beautiful ball of irrational fury, but he didn't really want to walk all the way home. His car would have provided the perfect amount of time required to calm his nerves, but that's just the way his day had been so-why not?_

_He rolled his eyes and decided he would walk half way and then use vamp speed the rest of the way. That would work out nicely and it did. He had plenty of time to clear his mind and prepare himself for what was to come. He knew she wasn't home because her car was not there which made him breathe a sigh of relief his body didn't need, but his mind required. At least he had a little more time to himself. He opened the door that was always unlocked- when you were a badass vampire and a powerful witch there really wasn't much to be afraid of-and walked inside, reality of the earlier argument hitting him square in the face._

_Their house was a mess. He supposed he was just so use to her using her powers he didn't even really notice when she did it any more. The windows he just had put in were broken, his favorite recliner that he and Bonnie use to cuddle in was in pieces, and pictures of the two of them lay face down on the floor from where they had fallen off the wall. If he walked through the house he knew every room would look similar to the living room he was standing in now, he decided one disaster was all he cared to take in for the moment and this time when he sighed, it was not one of relief._

_He took a seat on the couch since it was the only thing that was still in one piece and tried to rack his brain and figure out what in the hell was going on with Bonnie. He knew she had a temper, but this was beyond anything he had ever seen. This outburst made what she did to Klaus look like child's play. He came up with nothing. He knew this couldn't really be about Elena because she and Elena were best friends. Bonnie loved her like a sister and she knew Elena would never do anything to hurt her. He knew that even though he never gave Bonnie a reason to not trust him- at least not since they had been together-she knew she could trust Elena._

_He was also one-hundred percent sure that Bonnie knew that he didn't have any feelings for Elena because he always showered Bonnie with love and affection. He was still a bad-ass of course, he had a reputation to protect, but he was Bonnie's bad-ass._

_The very moment he decided he was going to go find his little witch and shake her until she told him what was really going on, he heard her car pull in the drive way. He could already smell her and she wasn't even in the house yet. He always loved how Bonnie smelled; like jasmine and vanilla. This time though, when he caught her scent, he smelled something off, something that didn't belong. He knew this smell, he had smelled it before but he couldn't quite put his finger on it, but it smelled wrong; very wrong._

_Bonnie was opening the door when he finally recognized the foreign scent; the scent that didn't belong anywhere near his Bonnie, let alone all over her. He could barely contain his rage. He knew he had to because he loved her and he didn't ever want to hurt her, but this was too much. He didn't want to think about it, he couldn't bear too. He didn't want to think about why in the fucking hell his Bonnie… his judgey, the most self-righteous person he had ever met in his very long life smelled like a were-wolf, but not just any were-wolf-as if smelling like a were-wolf wasn't bad enough- she smelled like the were-wolf he hated almost as much as he hated Klaus. His Bonnie smelled like Tyler Lockwood._

_He couldn't believe it; he didn't want to believe it. His ice blue eyes went wide and he was grateful he was already sitting down because he wasn't entirely sure his legs wouldn't have given out. Why did she smell like that mangy animal? This wasn't happening; this couldn't be happening. He loved her more than anything. She was his world and he had thought that he was hers. He had apparently thought wrong. How could he have been so wrong?_

_When she walked through the door into the living room and their eyes locked onto one another he could tell that she knew. He could see it in her eyes, the guilt, the heartbreak she felt was so strong he could swear he could smell it on her. He could only imagine what she was seeing in his eyes, it was definitely somewhere along the lines of barely contained rage and disgust and the deepest gut-wrenching sorrow anyone could possibly feel._

_He was waiting for something to happen, he didn't know what, and he couldn't even begin to imagine what could be done to remedy this situation. Something had to happen though, anything, to break this moment, this most awful, earth-shattering, heartbreaking moment. Damon had done many horrible things, unforgivable things and had been in situations most people wouldn't survive without being locked up in a padded cell afterwards, but none of that compared to this. He would rather have been staked a hundred times than have to be here right now, with her, learning this about her, his Bonnie._

_She must have decided she should be the one to break the silence, seeing as how she was the one who had been unfaithful. Unfaithful; that had to be the most disgusting word he had ever heard. Just thinking about that word made him want to vomit. The words she chose sounded so ridiculous considering the circumstances. She must have thought they might fix everything; they might erase everything that the last few minutes had uncovered._

_She couldn't have been more wrong, all they accomplished was to piss him off. She looked right at him, right into his eyes, like she was trying to see through to his soul, even though he hadn't had one for over a hundred years. With tears in her eyes and make-up running down her face she said three little words. Three words that were seemingly suppose to fix everything. She stared right into his eyes and said three stupid, useless words; she said "I'm sorry Damon."_

_He shot up from the couch.“You’re sorry? Sorry for what Bonnie?” His voice was eerily calm, he already knew what she was sorry for, but he needed to hear her say it. His rage was barely contained, the old Damon would have snapped her neck and sped out of the house and never looked back, but this was Bonnie and he wasn’t that man anymore._

_“Please Damon,” she pleaded tearfully, reaching for him. “Just let me explain.”_ _Damon jerked away from her so fast it could have rivaled his vamp speed. She gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. Her tears flowed freely down her face as her body was wracked with sobs. He watched as her knees gave out and she fell to the ground, her body shaking uncontrollably._

_Damon’s own tears cascaded down his face of their own accord. Damon wasn’t a crier, he never had been, but he had also never felt this kind of pain before. Time seemed to stop, he wanted to move, to run as fast as he could away from this whole situation, but his feet were rooted to the floor. He was stuck in some sort of hellish existence where he was forced to stand there and watch the woman he loved more than anything, sob uncontrollably on the floor in front of him in the home they had created together because she had cheated on him._

_He heard her repeating a chorus of “I'm sorry’s" and “ I love you’s" and “I don’t know how it happened" over and over again as she rocked back and forth on the floor. With every “I’m sorry" his heart broke. With every “I love you" his body shook. If he had been a human he would have most definitely had a panic attack, as it was this was as close to having one that he could get. He had to do something because he couldn’t be here anymore. He couldn’t look at her anymore. He gathered all of the strength he had left in his body and sped out of the house without looking back. He heard her scream his name as he left, but he didn’t stop, he couldn’t stop. He just kept running until finally exhaustion took over and he collapsed on the pavement of whatever road he was on. The pain came in waves, hitting him over and over again like an ocean crashing against a cliff side. It bubbled up inside of him until he couldn’t take it anymore. He pounded his fist into the hard concrete until his hand was bloodied and broken. The anguished scream he let out had nothing to do with the pain in his hand. What had she done to them?_

Damon’s eyes shot open. He rolled his eyes and took in a heavy breath. He had hoped he had drank enough bourbon that night to pass out and keep his stupid dreams away, but he had clearly been wrong. Rubbing a hand across his forehead, he sat up in his bed at the boarding house. “How much alcohol does it take to get a decent night’s sleep around here?”

He glanced over at the empty bottle of bourbon on his nightstand and the full one that remained unopened sitting next to it. Snatching the full one up and twisting off the cap, he said to his self, “ No time like the present to find out.” 

He put the bottle to his mouth and downed the whole thing. He closed his blue eyes and saw emerald ones staring at him. His eyes shot open for the second time that night. “Well, one bottle isn’t enough.” He climbed out of his bed and slipped on the sweats he left on the floor. Walking out of his room he went in search of more bourbon. He’d drink every bottle they had in the house if it meant he’d finally get a decent night’s rest. He’d get rid of those emerald eyes one way or another _._

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this year's ago on ff.net, but stopped for numerous reasons. I recently came across it again and have a renewed interest in Bamon after reading so many wonderful fics on here and decided to try my hand at writing this again. I already have a few chapters written, it's just a matter of going through and editing them. So we'll see how it goes.


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